internet legal society

From rgriffiths@ubmail.ubalt.edu Mon Oct 24 15:05:29 PDT 1994

Internet Legal Society is a not for profit disorganization dedicated to applying the fundamentals of the jury system to complex legal research. To this end, the ILS performs no actual research in established legal sources, instead relying on the legal opinions of unschooled lay persons to resolve conflicts – just like anywhere from six to twelve ordinary citizens do with questions of fact in life-or-death situations every day!

Just like the members of a jury, the members of the Internet Legal Society are drawn protestingly from all walks of life. If you have ever ventured an opinion on copyright, trademark, or common law assault in a newsgroup, then you are a member of the Internet Legal Society! Automatically. Whether you like it or not. So, don’t bother complaining.

The advantage of the Internet Legal Society’s method of resolving disputes is that there is no pesky precedent to slow down deliberations. Every problem is examined de novo[1], just like the International Court of Justice does in The Hague. The Internet Legal Society allows you to Go Wrong With Confidence [sm] because your opinion can never be overturned for error in finding of law.

When you need an answer, although not necessarily the correct one, you can turn to the Internet Legal Society.

____Footnotes___ [1] This is Latin for “after a flame war so intense it makes the explosion of a sun look like a weenie roast.”

– E Teflon Piano is a fellow at the Institute of Misapplied Psychometry and founder of the Internet Legal Society.[sm]